Romans 2:4 …do you despise the riches of His goodness, forbearance, and long-suffering, not knowing that the goodness of God leads you to repentance?
Just as patience will take anything from others, kindness will give anything to others. God, of course, is our supreme example. You’re a Christian because God’s love won you over. The goodness of God brought you to repentance. In the same way, when a husband loves his wife as Christ loved the church, she will respond. Just like the church responds to Jesus, a wife will respond to the love of her husband.
We need to show kindness to our wife. When you first started going out with your wife, you wanted to impress her. You dressed nicely and cleaned your car. You picked her up at her house and opened the door for her. You told her she was beautiful and brought her little gifts.
But after you got married things changed a bit. You still bring her gifts: “Honey, here’s my dirty laundry. Can you get it washed soon?” You open the door for her but sometimes close it before she’s all the way in. It is easy to take her for granted.
The Bible says of the virtuous woman that “her children stand and bless her. Her husband praises her” (Proverbs 31:28). Guys, when was the last time you praised your wife? When was the last time you complimented her?
I don’t know why but it’s generally the nature of men to suppress emotions and to suppress affection. So we have to make a conscious effort to go against the grain of what comes naturally. We have to make a conscious effort to show kindness.